Tabloid Headlines

J'aime le ridicule, et rien est plus ridicule que quelques des gros titres des tabloid press du supermarché.

Par exemple, cette un: La tête de l'homme explose!

Voici un autre: Le chat que parle stupéfie les scientifiques

Voici est une triste un: La mère tuée par un avion en papier

C'est tout vrai; c'est dans les journals!

I'm doing a presentation on trashy supermarket tabloids. l'll be holding up examples of each headline as I give my presentation. Here's what I'm trying to say:

I enjoy the ridiculous and nothing is more ridiculous than some of the headlines in the supermarket tabloids.

For example, this one: MAN'S HEAD BLOWS UP!

Here's another: TALKING HOUSECAT STUNS SCIENTISTS!

Here's a sad one: MOM KILLED BY PAPER AIRPLANE!

It's all true; it's in the papers!

Questions:

1) I know my translation is poor--any advice would be appreciated.
2) Is there a French equivalent for 'housecat'?
3) Would headlines be all caps in French tabloids?

Thanks for your help.

Al

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Permalink Reply by Marc Vonhalmen on October 9, 2009 at 9:58pm

J'aime le ridicule, et rien n'est plus ridicule que certains gros titres qu'on trouve dans les journaux.
Par exemple : "Sa tête explose !".
En voici un autre : "Un chat qui parle stupéfie les scientifiques".
En voici un plus triste : "Une mère tuée par un avion en papier".

Tout cela est vrai ; c'est dans les journaux !

2) "chat domestique", but it is seldom used. We simply say "chat".

3) No, usually they're not.

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Permalink Reply by Al Graham on October 9, 2009 at 11:29pm

Merci beaucoup, Marc.

A couple more questions:

In Canada, we think of tabloids as being not very credible scandal sheets. (We'd say 'newspaper' to refer to reputable publications.) Does 'les journaux' have the same disreputable overtone in French as 'tabloid' has in English?

Is 'his head blows up' more typically French an expression than 'Man's head blows up' ? [I can't help laughing at how ridiculous this sounds! :) ]

Thanks again,
Al

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Permalink Reply by Marc Vonhalmen on October 10, 2009 at 11:18am

Yes, actually "journaux" refer more to reputable publications than scandal sheets. For "tabloids", we'd rather say "magazines" or, more generally, "la presse à scandales". For tabloids about celebrities, we're used to calling them "les magazines people" (yes, really!).

About "his head blows up": in most of the headlines who refer to someone in particular (except is that person is famous, then we'd use his/her name), the tabloids are used to saying "Sa...", "Son...", Il...", "Elle..", etc. instead of "un homme", "une femme", ".... de l'homme", "...de la femme", etc. For instance: "Son chat a sauté d'un pont" would be an article about someone whose cat has jumped from a bridge. "Ses petits-enfants la trahissent" would be an article about a grandmother who has been betrayed by her grandchildren. "Il meurt en mangeant un hamburger" instead of "Un homme se tue en mangeant un hamburger", etc.